Many Americans are not only joking about moving out of the country if Trump wins, but are seriously considering it. Of course, I am basing the latter assertion on anecdotal comments from Facebook. On top of that, there are even dating sites, such as Maple Match, that are being launched in the event that people want to find both love and a way to Canada if he takes office. I can only presume we'll see more dating apps of this sort appear as we near Election Day.
Recently, an article popped up in my Facebook feed about Russia offering free land (2.5 acres) in a remote area of the country. Originally, Russia was only offering this to Russians in the original bill, and namely because they were hoping more "ethnic Russians" would relocate to this region. As the article points out, "ethnic Russians" is code for "European Russians" versus all the other folks who are also Russian.
The new bill is now offering free land to those outside of Russia, however. The article states, "[This] new bill to be passed next week contains a clause allowing foreign
citizens to apply for land as well. Foreign nationals will be allowed to
use the land on lease from the state for a period of five years."
Many of you have told me that you have fled the country and are in self-imposed exile in other parts of the world, something I note extensively in my recently published book.
So, what do you think, student loan debtors, would you move to Russia,
to the remotest part of the country, and also eventually become
naturalized to (potentially) escape student loan debt? Just curious.
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“Brrr, it’s awfully cold here Jim.”
“Living in Siberia is just the price we pay for freedom, honey.”
“But don’t you ever miss home? Our friends, our family, liquid water?”
“Have another chip of ice and stop talking nonsense, honey. We can’t go back to America, I’m a wanted man there, remember?”
“I know, Jim, but is defaulting on your student loans really such a crime? You sent them a check every month for years but when you lost your job you just couldn’t keep up with the high payments.”
“Yeah, and then when I couldn’t pay anymore they said I was cheating the government by defaulting, remember? An enemy of the state.”
“Oh, that’s an exaggeration. They don’t consider you an enemy.”
“Oh no? Remember when I tried to declare bankruptcy just to get a fresh start?”
“Yes, of course I remember.”
“And what did that get me? Nothing but an interrogation and humiliation at the hands of jack-booted government thugs."
“They were lawyers, Jim, and they were wearing Italian loafers.”
“Maybe so, but they grilled me on the witness stand, criticized every last cent I ever spent. They called it the “Undue Hardship Test,” to see if I was following the Party’s platform.”
“The Party, Jim?”
“You know, the Department of Education. Otherwise known as America’s seventh-largest bank. The Party line is that you must pay back every last cent of your student loans even if it means a lifetime of abject poverty. For the good of the Motherland, they say.”
“Remember Jim, they don’t call it the Motherland anymore.”
“Oh, that’s right, it’s the Bankerland now, I forgot. But do you see why we can’t go back?”
“I know Jim, I know. But it’s just so cold here. I’d say ‘I can even see my breath’ but that’s not true because my eyelids are frozen shut.”
“Honey, compared to being hunted down as a student loan defaulter for the rest of my life, this is paradise. Now, can you please pass me another bowl of borscht?”
“It’s half-frozen already, Jim.”
“That’s okay, honey, I’ll eat it with a fork.”
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