Thursday, April 22, 2010

It's sexist to say this, but, yeah, it's hysterical

We are, after all, talking about the hopefully soon to be anachronistic, matronly Sallie Mae, so calling this piece of evidence hysterical (a la Freud) is pretty befitting.

A reader let me know that Sallie Mae, or, as one State Support Leader derisively calls her (you know who you are!), "Queen Bee Sallie Mae," had sent them of all people (ha!) the following request for feedback:

Dear Forever-Indentured-Servant-And-Duped-Educated-Person,

Sallie Mae® is committed to continuously improving its products and services to serve you better and would greatly appreciate your feedback.

We are hoping to receive your feedback on how you feel about entrusting your student loans to Sallie Mae. By completing the very brief survey below, you will contribute to the improvement of our products and services. Your opinion counts – please help us enhance our ability to understand and serve you more effectively in the future.

Please click here to participate in this quick survey.

Thank you for your time. We are thrilled to have your business and are committed to providing you services, benefits, and advice you can't find anywhere else.


Sallie Mae Customer Care Team

Ha. Hahahahahahah. Ahem. Excuse. I'm sorry, I'd forgotten something. I didn't realize, they do care about their customers, right? This Queen Bee cares? Does she really? Sorry, Queen Bee, I don't think so. I guess I am committing treason, but what do I have to lose now, right? 

Here's what I declare, along with the Indentured Educated Class: we will make your  name, along with Nelnet (et al.), as infamous as the tobacco companies' names. No one on the Hill will be willing to take your filthy money - not if I have anything to do with it. You, Queen Bee, will be some day, God Willing, a pariah even on Capitol Hill - your crown stripped from you. That's when we will have triumphed.

 Warning: Queen Bee Sallie Mae Is Still Watching Over Several Beehives.


Anonymous said...

Oh please, send me a survey! I would LOVE to tell you people how I really feel. Gail-KY

bputley said...

Hehehehe this is funny. You know something is up with salliemae when they ask to take over all your loans. I remember a couple years ago I tried that and they denied me because they stopped due to the economy going under

Anonymous said...

Click on the link for the survey in the letter. The link works. I just tried it.

Anonymous said...

well i told them i would rather die and wait for bankruptcy to be available before i pay them. Yikes... thats how i feel.


Audrey said...

Today I was leaving the campus library when I heard a student talking to a loan company.

"So what is your advice for me because I can't make 1,800 dollars a month!"

And then I heard him reply with, "A hotel? You just told me to live in a hotel!?!!?!"

Disgusting and criminal.

Cryn Johannsen said...

Wow. So, is he supposed to live in a hotel with,uh, 10 other people? It's not as if a hotel in the U.S. is affordable. That is truly disgusting.

Anonymous said...

this is the new world order! when will you get it?

Cryn Johannsen said...

Because I don't buy that, TormentorSioux. What if Martin Luther King just accepted his own world of injustice? Or women said, "oh, well, they're right. We do belong in the kitchen." Well, that's not what those people did. They fought for the rights of others, and it's sad that people like you think in such narrow-minded ways.